|“Potter Puppet Pals Adventure (Song)”|
|Artist: Potter Puppet Pals|
This is the song article for the musical originally intended to be the "2nd episode" of the Potter Puppet Pals series. It was made before the Potter Puppet Pals Songs project was made. For the informative article about the medley, see Potter Puppet Pals Adventure.
STEVEN MILO: Hello, this is Steven Milo, the composer for the upcoming film, "The Potter Puppet Pals Adventure"! This is a fun FANTASTIC film, and I'm proud of the music that I've written for it. There are 6 musical numbers in the film, one of the main songs is called, "Get The Snitch". And it's- it's sung by Harry, with several other characters piping in from time to time. It's really a fun song, so.. let's look at a clip.
Get The SnitchEdit
HARRY POTTER: I've got to get the Snitch! I've got to get the Snitch! The game is called Quidditch and I've got to get the Snitch!
Flying through the air on a broom! I try my very best to avoid my doom! When in the corner of my eye It will loom! The Snitch!
I've got to get the Snitch! I've got to get the Snitch! I'm flying 'round the pitch, And I've really got an itch. Draco Malfoy's very rich, But his mother is a bitch!
DRACO MALFOY: Hey, I'll knock you in a ditch, and I'll beat ya' till ya twitch! HARRY POTTER: This will go without a hitch! RON WEASLEY: Sometimes I wish I were a witch! HARRY POTTER: I've got to get... the... SNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII- *CRACK!* OOMPFH!
STEVEN MILO: Now, Dumbledore, Harry's mentor, is not without his flaws, and- uh... I wrote this song... for him to show off... well- uh... a- a- at one point in the movie, Harry is rather depressed, and Dumbledore wants to cheer him up, so... he sings him a little song, and.. here's an excerpt.
ALBUS DUMBLEDORE: It's naked naked naked time! Naked as can be!
HARRY POTTER: (spoken) Oh my God!!
ALBUS DUMBLEDORE: Nakedness is so much fun! So much fun for me!
HARRY POTTER: (spoken) Stay away!
ALBUS DUMBLEDORE: They might call me a pervert, They may call me a fool but It's naked naked time... all around the school! WEEEE!!
(random overlayed yells and screams are heard as the nakedness is spread throughout)
STEVEN MILO: Hagrid, the half-giant is one of my favorite characters and- uh, he really gets his chance to shine in this next song. Certain people ostracize him because of his half giant blood, but as you can see in this song, he really embraces his enormity.
RUBEUS HAGRID: I'm a... half-giant, baby! Half-giant, baby!
My name is Hagrid, I'm like Don Juan. I want you baby, so let's get it on!
Oh, once you had half, You never go back. So get into the groove, And swing down by my shack.
Ooh, I'm round and I'm furry, And my hygiene's non-existent, But ladies ought to know I'm anatomically consistent!
I'm a... half-giant, baby! Yeh. And that's all I need!
Stopper On My PainEdit
STEVEN MILO: Now, one of Harry's personal antagonists is a- is the bitter Potions master, Professor Severus Snape. But he has a softer side. Uh, he's really... quite a tortured soul, and Snape's song really expresses how much he misses his secret love, who he has lost.
SEVERUS SNAPE: There were oh so many potions in the world For almost anything that you wish to attain, You can bottle fame, And brew glory, But you cannot put a stopper on my pain.
There is no potion that can mend a broken heart, I know this always will be true, There are remedies for impotence and mind-expanding hallucinogens. But there's nothing that can cure my love for you! No, there's nothing that can cure my love for youuuuuu! *sobs*
Drills and Bills...?Edit
STEVEN MILO: This next song shows up earlier in the movie. Uncle Vernon, another of Harry's tormentors, comes home from work at the drill factory, and goes off on a musical rant called Drills and Bills. Here's the clip.
RON WEASLEY: (spoken) Ohohoohhh!! Oh, this is exciting!
RON WEASLEY: (spoken) OOH!
HERMIONE GRANGER: (spoken) Stop giggling like that, slave boy!
RON WEASLEY: (spoken) Ooh- *whip* OW! Hoohoo-
STEVEN MILO: Oh my! I.. believe that's the wrong footage... oh dear, I thought that scene was removed... oh well, let's just move on! When Harry's true nemesis, the Dark Lord Voldemort is revived, he rises from his cauldron, and in a moment of inspired malevolence, he sings a real showstopper of a- uh- of- of- above his favorite magical spell, Avada Kadavra, the killing curse. Enjoy.
VOLDEMORT: They call me the Dark Lord Voldemort, I'm a sucker for evil of any sort, As long as get to zap my foes away! And boy, I love this magic spell! I can send my enemies straight to hell! It's such a blast I do it everyday! ... (spoken) HEY!
It really rolls off the tongue!
Killing people's never be this much fun!
Avada Kedavra! HUH!